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From: "David A. Ward" <antonio_ward_1968@...>
Subject: Ciencia ficcion y "remakes"
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10 peliculas de ciencia ficcion que nunca deber=C3=ADan objeto de un remake
10 Sci-Fi Films That Should Never Be Remade, and 5 That Probably Should Be
=20=20=20=20=20=20=20=20
Posted by Rob Hunter (rob@...) on December 11, 2008=20
=20=20=20=20=20=20=20=20=09
=20=20=20=20=20=20=20=20
Keanu Reeves=E2=80=99 The Day The Earth Stood Still remake got us
thinking about other impending re-imaginings of science fiction
classics.=C2=A0 That in turn got us thinking about =E2=80=9Cclassic=E2=80=
=9D sci-fi films
that should never get remade.=C2=A0 Which in turn got us thinking about a
few that probably should.=C2=A0 (That in turn got me thinking about Heather
Thomas=E2=80=99 boobies.)=C2=A0 This isn=E2=80=99t necessarily a list of un=
touchable
classics.=C2=A0 There=E2=80=99s nothing wrong with a=C2=A0remake=C2=A0that =
can=C2=A0improve on the
original=C2=A0in some integral way=E2=80=A6=C2=A0if the story can be made s=
tronger, or if
the original is no longer relevant to today=E2=80=99s audiences.=C2=A0 Some=
films
just can=E2=80=99t be made any better regardless of how much money and CGI =
is
thrown their way, so let=E2=80=99s just all agree that=C2=A0the ten films b=
elow
should never be remade.=C2=A0 Okay Hollywood?
A Clockwork Orange
- The message of Stanley Kubrick=E2=80=99s film is as=C2=A0relevant now as =
it was in
1971.=C2=A0 Youth gone wild, the hopeless quest for a Utopian society, and
authority figures who prefer blind allegiance over free will and free
thought are all around us even today, but a=C2=A0remake couldn=E2=80=99t ge=
t the
message across any better.=C2=A0=C2=A0In fact, I=E2=80=99d argue they=E2=80=
=99d fuck it up by
toning things down.=C2=A0=C2=A0No studio would=C2=A0bankroll a film where t=
he
protagonist partakes of brutal rapes and violence, and no lead actor
would take the role.=C2=A0 And what song would play over the rape?=C2=A0 Is=
there
any contemporary pop song that would muster the same effect as =E2=80=9CSin=
ging
in the Rain?=E2=80=9D=C2=A0 I=E2=80=99d vote for The Cure=E2=80=99s =E2=80=
=9CFriday I=E2=80=99m In Love=E2=80=9D, but a
studio would probably go with something less cool like Journey=E2=80=99s =
=E2=80=9CDon=E2=80=99t
Stop Believin=E2=80=99.=E2=80=9D
Soylent Green - Charleton Heston=E2=80=99s third attempt at sci-fi (after t=
he brilliant double-header of The Planet of the Apes and The Omega Man)
is remembered solely for=C2=A0the big reveal=C2=A0at the end.=C2=A0 But can=
you recall
any of the scenes leading up to that shocking twist?=C2=A0 Probably not.=C2=
=A0
The final line has been=C2=A0immortalized in pop culture, but it=E2=80=99s=
=C2=A0a
forgettable film without it.
Blade Runner - Do I really need to explain
why Ridley Scott=E2=80=99s classic tale of identity, loneliness, and what i=
t
means to be human shouldn=E2=80=99t be remade?=C2=A0 It shouldn=E2=80=99t.=
=C2=A0 Period.=C2=A0 And
that goes for all five of the versions.
Close Encounters Of The Third Kind - Like Blade Runner,
this film should also be an obvious candidate for the No Remake list.=C2=A0
Steven Spielberg guides a young and curious Richard Dreyfuss through
late night UFO fly-bys, marital troubles, and potato mountains, and no
actor could capture his transformation from obsession to awareness any
better.=C2=A0 The effects still stand up today, the musical notes used to
communicate between the species are ingrained into the social
consciousness, and there=E2=80=99s no geological equivalent to Devil=E2=80=
=99s Peak
that could be recreated on a dinner plate.
Time After Time - Jack the Ripper escapes
to modern day America in H.G. Wells=E2=80=99 time machine and the visionary
author must follow him through time.=C2=A0 Fucking awesome and criminally
underrated movie with brilliant performances by a mousy Malcolm
McDowell and=C2=A0an evil David Warner, and more suspense and terror than
usual for a PG-rated movie.=C2=A0 It=E2=80=99s not heavy on the effects, so
improvements there wouldn=E2=80=99t matter.=C2=A0 The acting by the two lea=
ds, the
mental and physical duel between them, is where the action and the
heart=C2=A0are and it could not be done any better.
War Of The Gargantuas - If Roland Emmerich=E2=80=99s big budget remake of G=
odzilla
taught us anything it=E2=80=99s that Jean Reno will sign on as =E2=80=9Cthe=
mysterious
Frenchman=E2=80=9D in any movie.=C2=A0 But it also showed us that the origi=
nal
Japanese Godzilla films, all seventy four of them, are=C2=A0more entertaini=
ng than any big-budget=C2=A0dud.=C2=A0 War of the Gargantuas
is a similarly entertaining, old-school, Saturday afternoon,=C2=A0Japanese
monster movie.=C2=A0 Two giant furry beasts, one brown and one green,=C2=A0=
knock
the piss out of each other=C2=A0and Tokyo.=C2=A0 CGI body hair will not be =
an
improvement (I=E2=80=99m looking at you=C2=A0Peter Jackson=E2=80=A6)
Runaway -=C2=A0I=E2=80=99m putting this on here in
honor of it=E2=80=99s writer and director, Michael Crichton.=C2=A0 The man =
birthed
unto the world=C2=A0multiple books and films featuring science pushed to th=
e
edge and beyond=E2=80=A6=C2=A0worlds filled with fantastic ideas and creati=
ons,
timeless tales of dinosaurs, medical conspiracies, and aliens,
fascinating plots and memorable =E2=80=98what if?=E2=80=99 scenarios.=C2=A0=
Runaway is not one of them.
The Fly - Like The Thing below, David Cronenberg=E2=80=99s film is itself a=
remake.=C2=A0 Also like The Thing below,
the performances and practical effects cannot be improved with new
actors and CGI.=C2=A0 Even with BrundleFly=E2=80=99s antics the movie still=
stands
as Cronenberg=E2=80=99s most human.=C2=A0 It=E2=80=99s filled with more emo=
tion than the
usual sci-fi fare, and that would be the first thing jettisoned if a
remake ever came to fruition.
The=C2=A0Ice Pirates - Robert Urich,=C2=A0Ron
Perlman, John Carradine=E2=80=A6 the ideal cast for a classic mid-eighties
space comedy!=C2=A0 Throw is some space herpies, a pimp-bot, and castration
via an=C2=A0assembly line with metal-jaws designed to bite off a guy=E2=80=
=99s junk,
and you have a fun=C2=A0romp that paradies Star Wars, pirates, and STD=E2=
=80=99s all at the same time.=C2=A0 A funny movie made all the more endeari=
ng by it=E2=80=99s incredibly bad effects.
The Thing - Yes, I know, John Carpenter=E2=80=99s The Thing is a remake=C2=
=A0of Howard Hawks=E2=80=99 The Thing From Another World.=C2=A0
So what.=C2=A0 Carpenter=E2=80=99s film is the definitive version.=C2=A0 Th=
e acting and
suspense could not be better.=C2=A0 The paranoia and tension could not be
more palpable.=C2=A0 And no CGI could ever touch Rob Bottin=E2=80=99s class=
ic and
visceral practical effects.=C2=A0 And yes,=C2=A0I also know the remake is
currently in development.=C2=A0 Fuckers.
Just as there are movies that shouldn=E2=80=99t be touched, there are just
as many=C2=A0films that could actually stand to be remade.=C2=A0 The films
below=C2=A0just might benefit from better production values and a modern da=
y
setting.=C2=A0 Here are five that I=E2=80=99d recommend fast-tracking into
development.
A Boy And His Dog
- A classic Harlan Ellison tale about a boy and his telepathic=C2=A0dog who
travel a post-apocalyptic America in search of food and sex.=C2=A0 Sometime=
s
they find them both in the same place=E2=80=A6 Remake this and have the dog
actually talk, a la Babe,=C2=A0with=C2=A0Paul Rudd=C2=A0as the wise-ass
canine=E2=80=99s voice.=C2=A0=C2=A0Jason Bateman can play the boy, and yes =
I know he=E2=80=99s a
bit too old to play a =E2=80=98boy=E2=80=99 but so was Don Johnson.=C2=A0 I=
n fact, Rudd and
Bateman could actually swap roles and this movie would still be
hysterical.
The Final Countdown - This is the Michael
Bay movie I=E2=80=99d see in the theater.=C2=A0 A modern day aircraft carri=
er
time-warped back=C2=A0to the Pacific Ocean in 1941, just hours before the
Japanese strike on Pearl Harbor=E2=80=A6 the effects would be awesome, the
battle would be huge, epic, and awesome, and if they succeed in
stopping the attack then maybe, just maybe, we=E2=80=99ll forget that Bay=
=E2=80=99s Pearl Harbor ever existed.
Logan=E2=80=99s Run - A past holocaust has left
survivors holed up in a domed city.=C2=A0 To keep population and order in
check the citizens are implanted with chips that change color when they
reach thirty years old.=C2=A0 Logan and Francis are Sandmen charged with
chasing and killing the runners who try to escape their ordained demise
on the Renewal Carousel (run by the main computer that slowly pulls you
up into the air before it causes you to explode to the delight of the
younger crowd below.)=C2=A0 The bare mechanics of the plot are brilliant,
and while Jenny Agutter is beautiful in her role as a member of the
underground, the movie as a whole looks and behaves incredibly dated.=C2=A0
There are more than a few goofy inconsistencies as well.=C2=A0 A remake
could keep the core story and revamp everything else for the better.=C2=A0
And imagine the hot, young stars who could headline!
2001: A Space Odyssey - A fellow FSR writer, an editor actually, insisted t=
hat 2001
be included on this list as a film in need of a remake.=C2=A0 =E2=80=9CI fu=
cking
hate that movie!=E2=80=9D he said.=C2=A0 =E2=80=9CThat=C2=A0shit sucks!=E2=
=80=9D=C2=A0 Some of you may find
that opinion to be blasphemy, but you=E2=80=99d be wrong.=C2=A0 He=E2=80=99=
d be right.=C2=A0
And=C2=A0I actually agree with him.=C2=A0 2001 is the Citizen Kane of
sci-fi movies=E2=80=A6 blindly revered as a classic simply because the bibl=
e
says so.=C2=A0 Have you actually sat down to watch either of those films
lately?=C2=A0 All the way through?=C2=A0 Be honest=E2=80=A6 boring as fuck =
aren=E2=80=99t they?=C2=A0
A remake could add improved effects, but maybe they could also add an
interesting story and a zippier pace.
Zapped! - You may not consider this
classic Scott Baio/Willie Ames comedy to be science fiction, but the
kid is zapped by a science experiment gone awry, and=C2=A0that=E2=80=99s a =
classic
sci-fi premise!=C2=A0=C2=A0Baio and Ames were the Michael Cera/Jonah Hill o=
f
their day=E2=80=A6 and this movie about a horny high-schooler who develops
telekinesis and uses it to undress ladies is begging for a remake.=C2=A0 No=
w
is a=C2=A0perfect time too=C2=A0because crude comedies are making a comebac=
k
thanks to uber-producer Judd Apatow and his=C2=A0merry band of perverted
actors.
:=3D=3D=3D David A. =3D=3D=3D:
=20=20=20=20=20=20
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Content-Type: text/html; charset=utf-8
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
<table cellspacing=3D"0" cellpadding=3D"0" border=3D"0" ><tr><td valign=3D"=
top" style=3D"font: inherit;">10 peliculas de ciencia ficcion que nunca deb=
er=C3=ADan objeto de un remake<br><br><br><h1>10 Sci-Fi Films That Should N=
ever Be Remade, and 5 That Probably Should Be</h1>
=20=20=20=20=20=20=20=20
<p style=3D"font-size: 9pt; margin-top: 5px; margin-bottom: 2px;">Posted =
by Rob Hunter (<i>rob@...</i>) on December 11, 2008 </p>
=20=20=20=20=20=20=20=20=09
<p style=3D"text-align: center;"><img class=3D"aligncenter size-med=
ium wp-image-25711" title=3D"sci-fi-banner" src=3D"http://www.filmschoolrej=
ects.com/images/sci-fi-banner.jpg" alt=3D"" height=3D"286" width=3D"580"></=
p>
<p>Keanu Reeves=E2=80=99 <em>The Day The Earth Stood Still</em> remake got =
us
thinking about other impending re-imaginings of science fiction
classics. That in turn got us thinking about =E2=80=9Cclassic=E2=80=
=9D sci-fi films
that should never get remade. Which in turn got us thinking about a
few that probably should. (That in turn got me thinking about Heather
Thomas=E2=80=99 boobies.) This isn=E2=80=99t necessarily a list of un=
touchable
classics. There=E2=80=99s nothing wrong with a remake that =
can improve on the
original in some integral way=E2=80=A6 if the story can be made s=
tronger, or if
the original is no longer relevant to today=E2=80=99s audiences. Some=
films
just can=E2=80=99t be made any better regardless of how much money and CGI =
is
thrown their way, so let=E2=80=99s just all agree that the ten films b=
elow
should never be remade. Okay Hollywood?</p>
<p><img class=3D"alignright size-medium wp-image-25719" title=3D"clockwork-=
1" src=3D"http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/images/clockwork-1.jpg" alt=3D""=
height=3D"250" width=3D"250"><strong><em>A Clockwork Orange</em></strong>
- The message of Stanley Kubrick=E2=80=99s film is as relevant now as =
it was in
1971. Youth gone wild, the hopeless quest for a Utopian society, and
authority figures who prefer blind allegiance over free will and free
thought are all around us even today, but a remake couldn=E2=80=99t ge=
t the
message across any better. In fact, I=E2=80=99d argue they=E2=80=
=99d fuck it up by
toning things down. No studio would bankroll a film where t=
he
protagonist partakes of brutal rapes and violence, and no lead actor
would take the role. And what song would play over the rape? Is=
there
any contemporary pop song that would muster the same effect as =E2=80=9CSin=
ging
in the Rain?=E2=80=9D I=E2=80=99d vote for The Cure=E2=80=99s =E2=80=
=9CFriday I=E2=80=99m In Love=E2=80=9D, but a
studio would probably go with something less cool like Journey=E2=80=99s =
=E2=80=9CDon=E2=80=99t
Stop Believin=E2=80=99.=E2=80=9D</p>
<p><strong><em>Soylent Green</em></strong> - Charleton Heston=E2=80=99s thi=
rd attempt at sci-fi (after the brilliant double-header of <em>The Planet o=
f the Apes</em> and <em>The Omega Man</em>)
is remembered solely for the big reveal at the end. But can=
you recall
any of the scenes leading up to that shocking twist? Probably not.&nb=
sp;
The final line has been immortalized in pop culture, but it=E2=80=99s&=
nbsp;a
forgettable film without it.</p>
<p><strong><em>Blade Runner</em></strong> - Do I really need to explain
why Ridley Scott=E2=80=99s classic tale of identity, loneliness, and what i=
t
means to be human shouldn=E2=80=99t be remade? It shouldn=E2=80=99t.&=
nbsp; Period. And
that goes for all five of the versions.</p>
<p><img class=3D"alignright size-medium wp-image-25718" title=3D"ce3k-1" sr=
c=3D"http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/images/ce3k-1.jpg" alt=3D"" height=3D=
"250" width=3D"250"><strong><em>Close Encounters Of The Third Kind</em></st=
rong> - Like <em>Blade Runner</em>,
this film should also be an obvious candidate for the No Remake list.
Steven Spielberg guides a young and curious Richard Dreyfuss through
late night UFO fly-bys, marital troubles, and potato mountains, and no
actor could capture his transformation from obsession to awareness any
better. The effects still stand up today, the musical notes used to
communicate between the species are ingrained into the social
consciousness, and there=E2=80=99s no geological equivalent to Devil=E2=80=
=99s Peak
that could be recreated on a dinner plate.</p>
<p><strong><em>Time After Time</em></strong> - Jack the Ripper escapes
to modern day America in H.G. Wells=E2=80=99 time machine and the visionary
author must follow him through time. Fucking awesome and criminally
underrated movie with brilliant performances by a mousy Malcolm
McDowell and an evil David Warner, and more suspense and terror than
usual for a PG-rated movie. It=E2=80=99s not heavy on the effects, so
improvements there wouldn=E2=80=99t matter. The acting by the two lea=
ds, the
mental and physical duel between them, is where the action and the
heart are and it could not be done any better.</p>
<p><strong><em>War Of The Gargantuas</em></strong> - If Roland Emmerich=E2=
=80=99s big budget remake of <em>Godzilla</em>
taught us anything it=E2=80=99s that Jean Reno will sign on as =E2=80=9Cthe=
mysterious
Frenchman=E2=80=9D in any movie. But it also showed us that the origi=
nal
Japanese <em>Godzilla</em> films, all seventy four of them, are more e=
ntertaining than any big-budget dud. <em>War of the Gargantuas</=
em>
is a similarly entertaining, old-school, Saturday afternoon, Japanese
monster movie. Two giant furry beasts, one brown and one green, =
knock
the piss out of each other and Tokyo. CGI body hair will not be =
an
improvement (I=E2=80=99m looking at you Peter Jackson=E2=80=A6)</p>
<p><strong><em>Runaway</em></strong> - I=E2=80=99m putting this on her=
e in
honor of it=E2=80=99s writer and director, Michael Crichton. The man =
birthed
unto the world multiple books and films featuring science pushed to th=
e
edge and beyond=E2=80=A6 worlds filled with fantastic ideas and creati=
ons,
timeless tales of dinosaurs, medical conspiracies, and aliens,
fascinating plots and memorable =E2=80=98what if?=E2=80=99 scenarios. =
<em>Runaway</em> is not one of them.</p>
<p><img class=3D"alignright size-medium wp-image-25717" title=3D"the-fly-1"=
src=3D"http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/images/the-fly-1.jpg" alt=3D"" hei=
ght=3D"250" width=3D"250"><strong><em>The Fly</em></strong> - Like <em>The =
Thing </em>below, David Cronenberg=E2=80=99s film is itself a remake. =
Also like <em>The Thing </em>below,
the performances and practical effects cannot be improved with new
actors and CGI. Even with BrundleFly=E2=80=99s antics the movie still=
stands
as Cronenberg=E2=80=99s most human. It=E2=80=99s filled with more emo=
tion than the
usual sci-fi fare, and that would be the first thing jettisoned if a
remake ever came to fruition.</p>
<p><strong><em>The Ice Pirates </em></strong>- Robert Urich, Ron
Perlman, John Carradine=E2=80=A6 the ideal cast for a classic mid-eighties
space comedy! Throw is some space herpies, a pimp-bot, and castration
via an assembly line with metal-jaws designed to bite off a guy=E2=80=
=99s junk,
and you have a fun romp that paradies <em>Star Wars</em>, pirates, and=
STD=E2=80=99s all at the same time. A funny movie made all the more =
endearing by it=E2=80=99s incredibly bad effects.</p>
<p><em><strong>The Thing</strong></em> - Yes, I know, John Carpenter=E2=80=
=99s <em>The Thing</em> is a remake of Howard Hawks=E2=80=99 <em>The T=
hing From Another World</em>.
So what. Carpenter=E2=80=99s film is the definitive version. Th=
e acting and
suspense could not be better. The paranoia and tension could not be
more palpable. And no CGI could ever touch Rob Bottin=E2=80=99s class=
ic and
visceral practical effects. And yes, I also know the remake is
currently in development. Fuckers.</p>
<p style=3D"text-align: center;"><img class=3D"aligncenter" style=3D"border=
: 0pt none ;" src=3D"http://media.filmschoolrejects.com/images/divbar.gif" =
alt=3D"" height=3D"3" width=3D"560"></p>
<p>Just as there are movies that shouldn=E2=80=99t be touched, there are ju=
st
as many films that could actually stand to be remade. The films
below just might benefit from better production values and a modern da=
y
setting. Here are five that I=E2=80=99d recommend fast-tracking into
development.</p>
<p><img class=3D"alignright size-medium wp-image-25716" title=3D"boyandhisd=
og-1" src=3D"http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/images/boyandhisdog-1.jpg" al=
t=3D"" height=3D"250" width=3D"250"><strong><em>A Boy And His Dog</em></str=
ong>
- A classic Harlan Ellison tale about a boy and his telepathic dog who
travel a post-apocalyptic America in search of food and sex. Sometime=
s
they find them both in the same place=E2=80=A6 Remake this and have the dog
actually talk, a la <em>Babe</em>, with Paul Rudd as the wis=
e-ass
canine=E2=80=99s voice. Jason Bateman can play the boy, and yes =
I know he=E2=80=99s a
bit too old to play a =E2=80=98boy=E2=80=99 but so was Don Johnson. I=
n fact, Rudd and
Bateman could actually swap roles and this movie would still be
hysterical.</p>
<p><strong><em>The Final Countdown</em></strong> - This is the Michael
Bay movie I=E2=80=99d see in the theater. A modern day aircraft carri=
er
time-warped back to the Pacific Ocean in 1941, just hours before the
Japanese strike on Pearl Harbor=E2=80=A6 the effects would be awesome, the
battle would be huge, epic, and awesome, and if they succeed in
stopping the attack then maybe, just maybe, we=E2=80=99ll forget that Bay=
=E2=80=99s <em>Pearl Harbor</em> ever existed.</p>
<p><strong><em>Logan=E2=80=99s Run </em></strong>- A past holocaust has lef=
t
survivors holed up in a domed city. To keep population and order in
check the citizens are implanted with chips that change color when they
reach thirty years old. Logan and Francis are Sandmen charged with
chasing and killing the runners who try to escape their ordained demise
on the Renewal Carousel (run by the main computer that slowly pulls you
up into the air before it causes you to explode to the delight of the
younger crowd below.) The bare mechanics of the plot are brilliant,
and while Jenny Agutter is beautiful in her role as a member of the
underground, the movie as a whole looks and behaves incredibly dated.
There are more than a few goofy inconsistencies as well. A remake
could keep the core story and revamp everything else for the better.
And imagine the hot, young stars who could headline!</p>
<p><img class=3D"alignright size-medium wp-image-25715" title=3D"2001-1" sr=
c=3D"http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/images/2001-1.jpg" alt=3D"" height=3D=
"250" width=3D"250"><strong><em>2001: A Space Odyssey</em></strong> - A fel=
low FSR writer, an editor actually, insisted that <em>2001</em>
be included on this list as a film in need of a remake. =E2=80=9CI fu=
cking
hate that movie!=E2=80=9D he said. =E2=80=9CThat shit sucks!=E2=
=80=9D Some of you may find
that opinion to be blasphemy, but you=E2=80=99d be wrong. He=E2=80=99=
d be right.
And I actually agree with him. <em>2001</em> is the <em>Citizen =
Kane </em>of
sci-fi movies=E2=80=A6 blindly revered as a classic simply because the bibl=
e
says so. Have you actually sat down to watch either of those films
lately? All the way through? Be honest=E2=80=A6 boring as fuck =
aren=E2=80=99t they?
A remake could add improved effects, but maybe they could also add an
interesting story and a zippier pace.</p>
<p><strong><em>Zapped!</em></strong> - You may not consider this
classic Scott Baio/Willie Ames comedy to be science fiction, but the
kid is zapped by a science experiment gone awry, and that=E2=80=99s a =
classic
sci-fi premise! Baio and Ames were the Michael Cera/Jonah Hill o=
f
their day=E2=80=A6 and this movie about a horny high-schooler who develops
telekinesis and uses it to undress ladies is begging for a remake. No=
w
is a perfect time too because crude comedies are making a comebac=
k
thanks to uber-producer Judd Apatow and his merry band of perverted
actors.</p><br><br><br>:=3D=3D=3D David A. =3D=3D=3D:</td></tr></table><br>
=20=20=20=20=20=20
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Sáb, 16 de Mayo, 2009 4:44 pm
"David A. Ward" <antonio_ward_1968@...>
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